All Things Digital

Skip to main content.

BoomTown

Simon Dumenco Saves Beacon’s Bacon!

Don’t miss this very funny piece by AdAge columnist Simon Dumenco about suggestions for other new Facebook products in the wake of its Beacon fiasco.

For those not following this sordid tale, the hot social-networking site stumbled badly in its handling of a new ad product that broadcasts your purchases from external Web sites back to your Facebook news feed.

Facebook has had to backpedal a lot on Beacon, including issuing an apology last week for it from Founder Mark Zuckerberg.

In the wake of Beacon’s dimming (sort of), clever Simon thought up some more ideas for the feckless Facebookers, such as Facebook Questioning:

Writes Dumenco:

Are you a closeted homosexual in a small Southern town? Facebook Questioning will automatically suggest to those friends and colleagues who are able to ‘read between the lines’ that maybe you’re ‘questioning’ your sexuality. It does this by comparing Beacon data with thresholds of what’s considered ‘normal’ heterosexual behavior by marketers. ‘The purchase by an unmarried, middle-aged male of more than two movie-musical soundtracks or DVDs per quarter doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s gay,’ says a Facebook veep. ‘But it will raise a rainbow-colored flag within our algorithm and might even help certain in-denial Facebook users with their own voyage of self-discovery.”

Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as Seinfeld says a lot below:

Add a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment. Sign up here or log in below.

Comments posted on this site must be signed with your full, real name. Please see our Comments policy for details.

Latest BoomTown Videos

More Videos »

About Kara

Kara Swisher started covering digital issues for The Wall Street Journal's San Francisco bureau in 1997 and also wrote the BoomTown column about the sector. With Walt Mossberg, she co-produces and co-hosts D: All Things Digital, a major high-tech and media conference. Read more »

Ethics Statement

Here is a statement of my ethics and coverage policies. It is more than most of you want to know, but, in the age of suspicion of the media, I am laying it all out.

Read more »