Memo to All Crepe-Hangers: It Still Ain’t Nobody’s Business If Jobs Is or Isn’t
by Kara Swisher
Posted on December 31, 2008 at 6:00 AM PT
Now, it’s getting flat-out macabre.
That would be the continuing swirl of attention the health of Apple icon Steve Jobs has been getting.
Rumors of his impending demise have been popping up periodically since the too-thin crisis of the Worldwide Developers Conference in June and look like they won’t stop until it actually comes true.
My grandmother used to have a perfect rejoinder for this kind of funeral-chasing behavior, which was prevalent among her gang of Italian sisters, who–whenever anyone caught a cold–predicted the worst outcome: “Don’t be a crepe-hanger.”
This time, more rumors surfaced yesterday in Gizmodo, curiously, a week before the Macworld at which he is famously not appearing. The site used a single–yes, that’s right–source saying his illness and not Apple’s business troubles with the conference’s organizer, IDG, was the reason for his pull-out.
The rumor, of course, sent Apple (AAPL) shares into a tailspin for the day, before others–such as CNBC’s Jim Goldman–posted just-as-strong refutations of the Jobs-Is-On-His-Last-Legs stories.
Blogger Robert Scoble even talked to a worker at a yogurt store that Jobs frequents and got a health report (good!).
Oh, dear–yogurt workers as medical experts? What’s next? Brain surgery consultation from the Starbucks barista? This is what we’ve descended to?
It has to stop, because the fact of the matter is that Jobs’s health is still nobody’s business, as it has not been throughout this bizarre obsession with one man’s personal issues.
In a post in late July, the last time this issue surged, I wrote:
And after listening to all of the debate about it–mostly indignant declarations by the media, making their case mostly by wheedling milder indignant declarations from stock analysts and corporate tsk-tsk outfits–I have concluded that what is ailing Jobs is exactly no one’s business.
Even if his every breath is critical to the ongoing operations of Apple, the reason most use as their main argument for Jobs to tell all, it goes double.
Why?
Well, any Apple investor has to know by now that Jobs suffered from a rather serious bout with a curable version of pancreatic cancer some years ago and that recovery includes inevitable complications.”
And, indeed, the only decent argument you can make to focus so intently on Jobs’s health of any relevance is the impact on Apple company stock, which is self-righteously trotted out each time these specious reports emerge.
The thing is, a lot of companies have been run by execs with health issues (and countries too–VP Dick Cheney’s ticker has been misfiring for a long time now, for example, and he still seems to have been running the show with a verve we wish he perhaps did not have so much of now).
But, to be fair, I will acknowledge the issue. But if anyone does not get that Apple’s CEO has health issues by now, they are ignorant in the extreme. The situation should be baked into the stock price.
In addition, Apple is run by a lot of other competent people besides Jobs and they too are part of its success. Here’s a news flash–Steve Jobs does not conceive, manufacture and wrap every iPhone and iPod.
That is the kind of mythology that has, of course, been propagated a lot by Apple and it is–like a lot of things–a bit true in a bigger concept.
But, as I recently said, when Jobs inevitably leaves the company, probably on his own two feet in retirement, the Cupertino HQ will not suddenly be taken up to the skies as if it were the rapture.
Maybe the yogurt shop guy knows about when that’s going to happen.
Speaking of rapture, here’s singer Jill Sobule singing about that at a recent D: All Things Digital conference.
And, in a second video, she sings perfectly about how we should behave when it comes to what is inevitable for us all. People riveted by Jobs’s fate might do well to take her sage advice.
Here are the videos:
Comments
The steve jobs death rumor started Dec 2006 a month before the iphone was revealed at Macworld 2007.
The hedge funds are making a killing out of killing Steve Jobs over and over again.
Posted by Richard Torcato at December 31st, 2008 at 6:32 amR:
A killing out of killing…well said.
Posted by Kara Swisher at December 31st, 2008 at 7:28 amSteve’s health is “material” and should be disclosed.
Unlike, GE, for example, the market value of Apple is affected by Steve’s presence at the helm, or not.
Posted by Dave Barnes at December 31st, 2008 at 7:51 am@kara – that’s what I call class. Brilliant juxtaposition, perfectly executed.
Posted by Dennis Howlett at December 31st, 2008 at 8:17 amD:
It has BEEN disclosed. He had cancer and it has made him obviously sickly.
Enough. We all get it that he has health issues.
But everyone on this planet–last time I checked–is terminal.
As my grandmother also said whenever I told her I was too busy to visit her: “The graveyards are full of indispensable people.”
(As it turned out, she WAS indispensable.)
Posted by Kara Swisher at December 31st, 2008 at 8:17 amYou can’t have it both ways. You can’t use the Jobs persona as part of your marketing to boost the cult-like following with all these big unveils every year… and then say his health is no one’s business. They’re playing both sides.
If it was just a regular old CEO that isn’t a huge part of their marketing hype, I’d agree… but they’ve used and promoted Jobs as a kind of second coming–which clearly has had positive effects on the stock price. If he’s in bad shape, it’s like saying they have to discontinue their post popular marketing campaign.
Posted by Charlie O'Donnell at December 31st, 2008 at 8:40 amC:
They have said he is sick and has been. They are just not giving you the details. And you don’t get to have them, unless you want to post your last blood test online too.
BTW, the marketing has actually been moving elsewhere for a while. Heard of Mac vs. PC or those weird dancing iPod ads?
You have all the info you need, Charlie. If you need more, you are a crepe-hanger.
Posted by Kara Swisher at December 31st, 2008 at 8:43 amC:
You really need to watch Jill’s second video and maybe get her excellent point.
Posted by Kara Swisher at December 31st, 2008 at 8:44 am@kara
Great post. Whatever Steve Job’s state of health, it is his business. As an Apple shareholder, I should have enough faith in Apple management to make the appropriate contingencies–if I do not, then I probably should not be a shareholder.
The broader, reoccurring issue you bring up is what kind of internal gating should social media outlets use before running with a story; although, I guess this is not just a “new media” problem, since CNN was bitten with this earlier this year.
Blogging, Twittering, etc have shown to have great power, but what about the culpability and responsibility that goes with that?
Posted by Omar Sultan at December 31st, 2008 at 11:21 amYes. This.
Jobs is a legend. He brought Apple back for a second act.
But what the hardcore Mac crowd has failed to notice is that the past few years (iPod era) have been about moving the company mainstream. They’ve been steadily moving the product out of the hobby world and into mainstream culture. Into a world in which Jobs as Legend would not be required to sell product. I think they’re succeeding at this.
I don’t really care about that though…with respect to Steve’s health. Just hope he’s well period.
Posted by Dave Johnston at December 31st, 2008 at 12:06 pmI’m more concerned about the integrity of our media, as are all Americans. So I’m convinced Gizmodo’s writers need to prove they’re not hedge fund shills by releasing personal financial statements, including tax filings, bank statements and the like.
What? You say that would be an invasion of privacy?
(Note: I’m under no illusion they’d see any parallel here).
Posted by ross richardson at December 31st, 2008 at 2:11 pm@ross – while that is an excellent point, I”d say a lot of the excitement tells me much more about the shallowness of the readership in certain places. I am glad that in the things I write, my audience will likely need more than 2 brain cells to understand what’s going on. Call that arrogant but to be honest, the quality of reportage and eyeball quotient in much of SV ‘reporting’ is close to zero. Kara has every right as a responsible reporter to make this point. She will be here a long time after the TC etc crowd have run out of things to say.
Posted by Dennis Howlett at December 31st, 2008 at 7:49 pmI think this discussion is rather morbid and borders obsession with this guys health. Certainly there are people in the area of the Apple Computer’s home offices that can drive by and see him driving around in his Benz. Certainly there are a few Stringers that live around there. : /
Posted by Mathue Taxion at January 1st, 2009 at 5:08 pmsingle sourcing for reporting on steve’s health: problematic, unethical, bad deal.
reporting on steve’s health: absolutely material, a matter of public record for investors, not an invasion of privacy.
end of story (not).
Posted by dave mcclure at January 1st, 2009 at 11:43 pmO:
I could not agree more. Reporting is, um, hard.
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:37 amD:
Excellent point. Apple has surely changed.
And let’s hope Jobs is well too.
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:38 amR:
Well, see our disclosures. They are a good step in that direction.
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:39 amD:
Indeed. I am a lifer!
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:40 amM:
Benz-stalking? Jobs is not exactly Britney.
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:41 amD:
Not!
Posted by Kara Swisher at January 5th, 2009 at 2:41 am