Microsoft announced much better than expected results–led by strong Windows and Xbox demand and cost discipline.

Here are Microsoft’s slides on the financial results, which you can enjoy all weekend long (if you have no life, it goes without saying).

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Well, well, well, that financial imp at Microsoft–CFO Chris Liddell–pulled a fast one on Wall Street and turned in first-quarter earnings that blew away all estimates and even whisper numbers.

BoomTown liveblogged the morning conference call, which took place at 7:30 am PT–thanks for the Kiwi-laced wake-up call, Chris!

While revenue and net income in Q1 were down significantly from the same period a year ago, they were not as bad as investors expected.

Which apparently passes for terrific these days!

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As the wind-up act for the Financial Analyst Day at Microsoft today, its CFO, Chris Liddell, took the stage to try to put a shine on weak financial results that the software giant recently reported.

“So, what genetic disposition do you need to be a CFO? Essentially, you need to be miserable, you need to be the sort of person who takes drinks away from people at the end of a party,” said Liddell, in his jaunty New Zealand-Hobbit accent. “So, you know, my colleagues who have been giving you drinks all day, have told me to come out here and take most of them away from you.”

Which was ironic, since the all-day event for media and Wall Street analysts ended with cocktails.

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Well, despite the news being as bad at Microsoft as it was at Yahoo earlier this week, the conference call after the software giant released its third-quarter earnings was 100 percent less naughty and 200 percent more glum.

In other words, while there were no F-bombs dropped, there were lots of E-bombs–as in econalypse.

Here’s BoomTown’s liveblogging of the call–featuring the software giant’s semi-apocalyptic CFO, Chris Liddell.

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Earlier today Microsoft decided it would drop the bomb early by moving its second-quarter earnings conference call to 8 a.m. PST instead of 2:30 p.m. PST.

BoomTown, naturally, had to liveblog the Microsoft event, in which its execs tried mightily to put lipstick on a very ugly pig. It was a good effort, at least.

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Microsoft said its financial performance took a major hit, with revenue up only two percent and net income down 11 percent, whiffing badly on Wall Street’s expectations. In addition, the software giant said that it would cut 5,000 jobs and other costs across many divisions over the next 18 months, starting with 1,400 today, pegging operating cost savings at $1.5 billion annually. Perhaps most ominously, Microsoft said it would not give profit and revenue guidance for the rest of the year because of the economy’s turmoil. Apparently, even the smartest of techies have little insight to this very foggy financial situation.

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