How low can Microsoft go?

Very low, it seems, in announcing really bad fourth-quarter earnings, missing Wall Street revenue estimates by an astonishing $1 billion.

Talk about a game of extreme limbo.

After the market close Thursday, the Redmond, Wash.-based tech giant reported that fiscal fourth-quarter net income fell to $3.05 billion, or 34 cents a share, from $4.3 billion, or 46 cents a share, in the same period a year earlier.

Revenue for the period ended in June fell 17 percent to $13.1 billion. Wall Street had been looking for earnings of 36 cents a share on $14.37 billion in revenue, according to data compiled by Thomson Reuters.

Online advertising revenue took a big hit, decreasing $86 million or 14 percent, to $529 million, as the display advertising business got hard hit.

No surprise–Microsoft (MSFT) shares have been taking a beating in after-hours trading.

BoomTown liveblogged the earnings call.

2:32 pm PDT: The conference was kicked off and Microsoft CFO Chris Liddell–whose jaunty New Zealand accent I never tire of–came on right away, pointing out the very obvious bad news in several different ways, although also trying to find some kind of silver lining.

The quarter, he said, “marks the end of one of the most difficult [periods], but also most encouraging.”

The darkness has a dawn, he noted: “In my mind, we are a stronger company than we were a year ago…but we need to lift our game to a new level in 2010.”

You can say that again!

So Liddell did, saying that “there are some signs that we have at least seen the worst” of the econalypse, and “looking forward, we do not expect trading conditions to get worse.”

Well, how could they?

2:35 pm PDT: Microsoft’s investor relations guy went over the numbers. Crappy results, but meaningful cost savings.

Read the official press release here.

2:48 pm PDT: Liddell came back on and he said this would be one of the most “interesting” years, especially due to a spate of new product rollouts coming, such as Windows 7.

He did some forward-looking, talking about a variety of arenas at Microsoft, from the games business to its product launches to tax rates.

Microsoft has, despite the economic turmoil, a great balance sheet in terms of cash–with over $30 billion.

I think I found a gold lining.

2:56 pm PDT: Question-and-answer time.

The first was about spending on personal computers, which hit Microsoft badly on the downside, said Liddell.

But, as a refresh cycle kicks in, he noted that average selling prices will go up.

It would eventually get “better,” which Liddell pronounced, bitter.

Irony alert!

The next question was about margins. Microsoft has tried to cut costs, said Liddell, although it would never completely offset the bad economic conditions. And he was not making promises.

A follow-up on buying back more Microsoft stock. Nope, because “we’re still not sure we’re out of the woods.”

The next question was about what customers are saying about the Windows 7 upgrade and about server shipments.

No surprise, but server shipments are weak. “We don’t see a lot of pent-up demand in that area,” said Liddell.

As to PCs and Windows 7, he said he has more hopes of people being more likely to start to move over. Or, at least, prepare to do so.

“Then, you start to get into a much more virtuous cycle,” said Liddell.

A question on whether expenses can be slowed more.

Sorry, analysts! Nope.

Another question on looking at PC-refreshing. We’ll see, said Liddell.

Another expense question. Hey, analysts, you might want to stop asking since Liddell is not going to suddenly say Microsoft is lopping off more employees–at least, not right now!

Plus, there are those pricey upcoming product launches, said Liddell, which is going to take some dollars.

“There are a series of relatively small items, which add up,” he said.

3:09 pm PDT: An annuity question. Zzzzzzzzz.

Analysts continued to try to get Liddell to predict when things were going to take off again and return to the golden times when Microsoft was a regular financial powerhouse.

It was admirable that he refused to take the bait and maintained his tone of semi-doom and lessening-gloom.

“I would not promise that it is going to be significantly better,” said Liddell.

3:18 pm PDT: A question about the latest launch of Office in 2010 and its impact on financials.

Liddell said he did not see a significant impact until 2011.

The next question was also one on revenue: “Is revenue going to grow?” asked one analyst in a kind of desperate-sounding way.

Liddell said Microsoft would be watching costs, which would help. As to revenue, which is less controllable, he could not say.

3:22 pm PDT: Although there have been no queries about Microsoft’s discussions with Yahoo (YHOO) about a search and online advertising partnership–which will cost the company a pretty penny, if struck–there was a question about Google (GOOG) and its Chrome operating system.

“We still believe that people will want a client and an Internet-based experience,” said Liddell.

Translation: Google is a mouse that roared!

The final question was about how various geographies are doing. Asia and emerging markets are a place for growth, said Liddell, followed by North America, especially relative to Europe and Japan.

But, the tone of the earnings call? Economically speaking, it’s still a small world after all.

What’s in a name?

Well, a lot, actually, and BoomTown supposes it would be just like those Pacific Northwest types at Microsoft to name the new version of its search service “Bing,” presumably after the cherry that is a big product in the company’s home state.

That moniker is one of many being bandied about in a group the software giant could be considering for the big relaunch of its search service, which the company has been prepping.

Microsoft’s search service is currently called–zzzzz–Live Search.

“All About Microsoft” crack blogger Mary-Jo Foley of ZDNet recently wrote about the Bing name, which is registered to the company, as well as “Hook” and the one that Microsoft is using now as its test name, Kumo.

Kumo means “cloud” and “spider” in Japanese, which seems a wee bit esoteric.

Today, paidContent.org dropped “Sift” into the mix, although it seems to be related to mobile phones, along with “Swivel.”

I, for one, am feeling both like flour and getting dizzy at the thought of those names.

Foley at ZDnet feels the same, noting today in a post:

“(Would Microsoft be crazy enough to trademark its general Web search engine and its search engine for mobile with two different names, say Bing and Sift? As Windows Live has shown, truth can be stranger than fiction….)”

Microsoft (MSFT), of course, is keeping the name for its search service under tight wraps, but it is obviously going to be spending a shipload of money on its branding in another attempt to catch market leaders Google (GOOG) and Yahoo (YHOO).

Microsoft has been recently talking to Yahoo about a search partnership deal, although they are likely both to keep their brands and search products in any event.

Nonetheless, execs and minions in the know laugh at me loudly when I ask them to leak it to me.

(Note to anyone at Microsoft: Pretty please, someone leak it to me, even if it’s in the form of a memo from the leaky cauldron that is Yahoo.)

I doubt someone will, though. “It’s like Fort Knox secret,” said one Softie source, referring to the Kentucky fortress where the largest amount of the United States gold reserves are stored.

Hey, if Auric Goldfinger, OddJob and Pussy Galore could get into Fort Knox in that most excellent James Bond film, I can certainly find out the name of Microsoft’s search service!

Personally, I like Bing, and cherries from Washington state are indeed tasty (and coming soon too!)

According to the Heart of Washington Web site, its state’s cherries rate. Some fun factoids:

- Washington State produces more than 50 percent of all the sweet cherries in the United States.
- The Rainier cherry, which is yellow with a red blush, was made from a cross between two dark red cherries, the Van and Bing.
- Americans eat approximately 2.6 pounds of cherries per year.
- There are approximately 53 pitted cherries in one pound of cherries.
- The Bing cherry, which all cherries are measured against, was first developed in 1874 in Milwaukie, Ore.
- The Bing cherry was named after one of Seth Lewelling’s workers. The Bing cherry was developed by Seth Lewelling.
- Washington cherries are shipped around the world; the top three foreign markets are Canada, Taiwan and Japan.
- In 2001, there were 29,000 acres of sweet cherries in the state.
- The Washington cherry season begins in late May with some product seen at farmer’s markets. Commercial shipping begins around June 5, and will continue until mid-August. The peak of the season runs from June 20 to Aug. 1.

Plus, if Microsoft uses Bing, they could also rebrand their MSN online service, “Bada” and their email product, “Boom.”

Then, they can get Tony Soprano as their spokesman with the motto: “Bada Bing, Bada Boom, Notta Bada Algorithm!”

Or better still: “If you use Google, we’ll whack you!”

Now, that’s more like it.

OK, now we’re cooking with gas at Yahoo’s annual meeting in San Jose, as various shareholders–mostly small ones–come to the microphones to give Yahoo a piece of their mind.

The room has filled up more, about one-third to one-half full, with the top Yahoo (YHOO) leadership arrayed at a table up front like an Italian wedding.

First up, longtime Yahoo activist shareholder Eric Jackson asked Yahoo Chairman Roy Bostock to step down, noted that Yahoo had overplayed its hand with the Microsoft bid, wondered about Yahoo President Sue Decker’s time problems (too many outside boards) and questioned the worth of Yahoo’s deal to sell an asset in Japan.

Yahoo, of course, did not agree with Jackson! At all!

“No,” said Bostock about stepping down, also noting that he was woefully underpaid for his board service, given all the activity over the last year related to Microsoft (MSFT).

Next up, a shareholder asked about Yahoo’s poor performance compared to Google (GOOG).

Yang’s answer: We’re trying!

Next, a shareholder supported Yang, noting that Yang did co-found the company. But then he kind of suggested Yang perhaps leave the company for a “cathartic” time.

The same shareholder also compared Bostock’s defense of Yahoo’s behavior with “a girlfriend who is trying to convince the world that she initiated the breakup.”

That made Yang smile.

Later, Bostock added: “I would not compare Yahoo’s relationship to Microsoft to a romantic one.”

The next question was related to China and Yahoo’s thorny history there. Yang had addressed the issue earlier and added that the company was working hard to improve its efforts related to human rights.

While one former employee and shareholder called Yahoo “rude” not to entertain more questions from investors, another shareholder called Microsoft “a green-tentacled monster,” I think, which provoked laughs and clapping.

A question was then asked about advertising and competing with Google-owned DoubleClick. Decker noted that Yahoo’s Web-based approach is better.

One shareholder noted the lack of women on the board (there is one), and a shareholder justifiably complained that only one-third of the directors did not show up and also not enough of the board owns stock, such as Ron Burkle (who was apparently in Europe at another commitment.)

Perhaps of everything that went on at the annual meeting, which was mostly nothing, perhaps that was the most salient point of all.

While there are rumors that these wildly popular videos of a posse of cellphones popping popcorn by their rings or other unknown death rays are fixed, BoomTown actually does not care one iota, as the remote possibility that they are not is freaking me out.

Frankly, it would freak Orville Redenbacher out too.

But they are still riveting.

Here are a few choice ones with an international flair:

From Japan:

From France:

From the United States: